Workout Wednesday Ass

Workout Wednesday!

Today I got my fair share of exercise in. A whole bunch of chorelates! Shaving butts with my mom. That’s right- SHAVING BUTTS! My old doggy Jasmine got a poopie butt. It smelt so wretched. I checked Melody’s diaper just to make sure there wasn’t a hole blown through it. Dynamite super galactic poo! Buuuut there wasn’t. Jazz found the perfect decoy to stay by. Bathed her, then shaved her butt. Then Sunshine&Gavin.
Threw Melo in the tub after playing in the sprinkler.
So EVERYBODY has a clean butt in this household. =P

So here are a great bunch of butt,back, ab control, and legs workout. After all we don’t want a sh!tty butt right! =P
My favorite is the donkey kick. Doesn’t affect my cysts too much either. I just have to keep them at 50 counts on each leg.
Now, I’m sure pistol squats will shoot the poo straight outta ya. So I think I’ll pass on those for today =P Pop a squat later!

Keep up the good work y’all.


Ben’s Bitter Blog

As much as I enjoy blogging, I enjoy reading other blogs too. But these past two weeks I’ve been slacking. I’ve been keeping up with Melody’s new sleep schedule. Or lack of. She decided naps aren’t her thing anymore. La pent =| R.I.P. Naps! Life is far too exciting to drift off to sleepy land for her. On the bright side she goes to bed around 7-9. But by that time I’m tired and try to stay up to get some reading in.

Luckily, I was going through my wordpress feeder to see Bens Bitter Blog having a recap. Explosion of awesomeness. Belly workout of laughs. Go see =D


If you have heard someone yelling at Walmart,”HAVE YOU SEEN A REINDEER!? MY GRANDDAUGHTER LOST HER REINDEER!” That was my mother. Yep, THAT happened!
The whole reason MelMel was crying and unleashing the inner beast on Saturday at Walmart while doing the Easter Bunny’s job was because she lost her comfort reindeer. I didn’t even put two an two together. We got to the car, she’s throwing a tantrum of ALL tantrums and then it hits me. Shiz! Her reindeer! I felt horrible. Tears gushed out,”MOM! Her reindeer! That’s why!”
So super mom takes off inside. Now if I would’ve known she was going to go in there balls out sounding like Ms Claus, I would’ve had her wait outside lol people probably thought she was cray cray- a reindeer? Give me whatever she’s on! And the true believers were thinking- we better help or it’ll be a year without a Santa Clause! Damn Donner&Blitzen!

She came out 8 mins later with Melody’s reindeer. Instant smile across Melody’s face. Such relief in me. MelMel had set it on the bench while we looked for Easter cards. First time I completely didn’t keep tabs on his whereabouts.
This reindeer is special. He posses the power to make her sleep. The ability to calm her down. The comfort for those moments of uncertainty. Losing him would be a tragedy.

“People were looking at me like I was nuts. I was walking up to employees asking them if they’ve seen a I reindeer. Few looked at me weird.

Jokingly I ask,”Well mom, did you describe him about yay height!?! They probably thought you were Ms. Clause!” Lol

“I had to find him after you started crying. I almost started crying over that deer! I got frantic! REINDEER! ANYBODY SEEN A REINDEER AROUND HERE! No one had seen him! Yeah! No kidding, you don’t help Ms Claus find the reindeer there won’t be a damn Christmas!”

See! If the Easter Bunny would do his stinkin’ job this never would’ve happened. I’m telling you! =P

Easter Egg Hunger Games Training Has Begun!

MelMel grasped the concept as soon as she saw the first egg under the bush. I walked in front of her through the front yard and stop so she could look around in that area. Every time she got one she cheered “YEAY!” My favorite was when she found the egg by the tree after standing on the stump for a birds eye view. Lol ,”Yeah!Yeay! Yeah boi!” As she spotted it by the tree. Then she demanded Grandpa’s hand to hunt with her. So cute.
We did the Easter Egg hunt 3 times. You know, to prepare her for when she’s older to go against the other kids- beat them down to the eggs first. Kind of like Hunger Games training, but it’s Easter Egg Hunting =P The third time was level difficulty. Apparently she’s more advanced. She dug in the bush to get them. Next time- level extreme. She will have to climb =P All part of her hunger games training! I mean, Easter egg honing hunting skills.

Hope y’all had a wonderful Easter.


Easter Bunny Owes Me

The Easter Bunny owes me! FINALLY done gathering everything for tomorrow’s main event. I’m so excited to see her reaction.
It wasn’t as easy shopping with her for goodies like it was at Christmas. She doesn’t want just any toy. She actually sees things she wants, like Doc McStuffins characters, and grabs for it. Not the ones she already has. So sticking stuff like the Barney DVD in the cart didn’t go unnoticed. That was my FIRST “oh shiz” realization moment that I can’t be bringing her with me for gift shopping anymore. There was screaming involved. LOTS AND LOTS of screaming with the added swimming body motion in sitting position. The screaming amplified shortly after that but I’ll get to that later.

I am going to have her try Easter Egg hunting…….. I don’t know what thee F I was thinking, now that I’m sitting here thinking about her trying to find these eggs. I bought 6 medium sized ones. Cinderella socks, jelly beans, play necklaces, and teddy Grahams to go inside of them. I guess at that moment I decided this’d be a good idea, is that she would actually be able to understand to go find them. Seeing as when I ask her,”Where’s your deer?” She goes and looks for her beloved deer she can’t be without. So asking her,”Where’s the egg?” Shouldn’t be any different. Lol Now I’m thinking I’ll just go walk around with her hoping she will pick them up and put them in her chick basket. Buuuuuut I’m pretty sure I’ll forget where I put these suckers! My memory is short since my mind is busier lately. So perhaps a map! A-HA! I probably wouldn’t have thought about that if I wasn’t watching Jake&Neverland Pirates. Lol
My next fear with this whole egg hunting is that once she opens them she will get the goody. So if she grabs the eggs out of the fridge like she had a few days ago while I was getting two out, is she going to smash them open to a “goody”!?! Lol This theory is based on a true story. I kid you not! My friend’s son found more “Easter eggs” after the Easter Egg hunt in the fridge thanks to his daddy. His mommy wasn’t too thrilled having to explain why he had to leave them alone and not open them, but none the less found it hilaRious Lol Too cute.

See none of this would be the issue if that pesky Easter Bunny would do his damn job! =P

Case of the Sticky Ickies

I’m about to never shower again! Her sticky little hands on my legs and arms. Even my hair. I’ll have cleaned her hands, mins later she is stickified!
Sneezing in my ear today topped every bit of mess on me. And then Gavin with his drool mouth hovering over my shoulder thinking I have food.
Shower at day’s end…… Sticky fingers touching my cheeks. Sticky icky!
Tomorrow is already beginning! Lol

There was once a time when she would come up to me just to wipe off her sticky hands. Very prissy. Or else she looked like she was doing the hokey pokey, throwing her arms about, turning herself around. It was quite the show she’d put on…… WHAT HAPPENED to THAT Melody =P

Despite all of her sticky ickyness, I’m glad she even has fingers to get sticky.